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I am Josh 44 yo married to a hot black women 15 year my junior. I knew her personality was very dominant from the beginning and I introduced her to flr. She loved every piece of it and we couldn’t be better. However nothing are just roses and eventually she’s being insisting on the idea of dating other men. I don’t like to say no to her but I have been struggling with this. I don’t see myself as a cuck. I don’t know if it will be healthy for us. I feel like on crossroad. Even though we’ve spoken a lot about it we can’t get to a common point. It might be hot and good to our relationship but I am not sure an insecure about it. Any ideas?
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I am married and in an FLR. I do not want to be a cuck and my wife has no interest in this as well so there is no problem. Many submissive men get off on being a cuck. Some of them are bi and will give oral sex to the cuck (so they say online).
I assume you don’t want to get divorced. You say you have discussed it with her a lot and she still wants it. If you want to continue the FLR marriage then you probably have to accept it. Your other option is to tell her that this crosses a line and you won’t accept it and then see if this leads to separation or divorce.
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One thing that you must always remember in a FLR is, consent.
A good FLR is a loving relationship but it must be consensual.
All activités must be agreed upon.
Control is given to the leader freely and should never forced upon
the follower.
Now you may have given your partner the ultimate power to determine
all aspects of your lives together, but the power should never
be abused. Although you have given ultimate power, the reality is
there are limits to your consent. You have morals and values that
create limits to what you will or can do and your partner must
acknowledge and accept these limits.
If being cucked is a hard limit then your partner must make a choice.
Breakup with you. Try to force you (which might lead to breakup.)
Accept your limit and forget about cucking you. Drop the topic for now,
but slowly move you in that direction.
If this is something that you may eventually may be open to,
your partner could start by feminizing you. Getting you to think
and appear like a girl/sissy.
I suggest that you read books by Lady Alexa. Specifically the one
on how she feminized her husband. -
I agree with James.. consent is everything. Did you both discuss these kinds of things prior to marriage? This is why communication is so incredibly vital.. best to discuss all potential situations that might be hard or soft limits to avoid surprises down the road.. now you’re at a place where she’s wanting to further explore and you’ve some hesitancy.
Further learning material is probably going to be a useful tool but do some research before you just jump on any one resource..
Open the lines of communication and try to see where things are stemming from.. her desires and your hesitancy. I would think if the relationship is mutually loving that she would be willing to at least open dialog and try to sort things out, out of mutual respect for one another. Level of control in the dynamic may also play a part.. relationships can fluctuate so long as both parties feel safe and their needs are met (to whatever degree your dynamic allows).
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She is the domme and you are the submissive. Ultimately she makes the decisions. I personally would welcome this if I was in an flr. If she wants lovers outside of the marriage you’re going to have to accept it. But stay loyal to her, don’t change who you are. Try to focus on her happiness, and this will make her happier. Love her and be grateful that she’s being open about her needs.
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It is difficult when you are used to a certain set of rules and then they change, as I am sure that there are a fair amount of guys who don’t want to be a cuck. Is there any chance that you could try just once and see what happens?
For me I would agree with Sopare. If my queen introduced this into our relationship, then I would agree to it, as ultimately it is her happiness which is the most important. I would want to please her no matter what the situation is.
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Thank you for your support, guys. I appreciate it indeed.
I get some news. I dropped the topic for a while, but my wife kept making comments about other men she’s found desirable every now and then. Then I said we could try it once. I could see the shine on her eyes, she then said I am the best husband of the world etc.
She had her first date, sent me hot videos making out and everything, You bet she enjoyed more than myself hahaha.
Afterwards it’s alright. She wants to settle a day of the week like “her night out” when I have to stay in and take care of our baby daughter.
At the end of the day I realised she is not a woman of only one man. She wants more children in the future and she mentioned cheeky that she would love to get pregnant from other man who she actually doesn’t know who is the real father but I think she wasn’t serious about it.
I just don’t know what James wanted to mean to try feminisation. I think it doesn’t have anything to do with cuckold. However my wife already made few mentions about it in the past.
A bit messy but there you are.
Thanks for your support again, -
I am glad that after your wife had tried the idea Josh, that you have thought about how she sees men. It is a mature way of thinking and as you say you benefit, as your wife appreciates you for not minding about her night out.
I think that James is only mentioning feminisation as an added option. Some people prefer it more than others. As you mention it probably isn’t connected with cuckold. Glad though that you have managed to work things out.
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Yes, Melvin, it’s true. But there is a saying that when you solve a problem, you create another.
Nowadays my wife said she wants to have both steady lovers and new ones. So far so good, but eventually she mentioned again that she wanted to have a baby from “them”, and never really know who the real biological father is, but it will be raised as ours. She has a wicked sense of humour, I really don’t know if we will get that further.
But… What if …? -
Maybe she is testing the boundaries with you Josh, by mentioning that she would like to have baby with them and you will help to bring them up. Is that something you would want to do?
If not, then you should say this to your wife. It is the same with multiple lovers. It sounds like she is really expanding the limits of your flr.
As James and Tempest have said communication is key and you shouldn’t be forced to go along with anything you are not comfortable with. Everyone is different, I see an flr as pleasing my queen no matter what she asks.
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Actually I think no, I wouldn’t want it. She is already pregnant of our second child and she wants four in total. She said she wants at least one, born out of wedlock. She is certainly testing the boundaries. Well, what can I say, let’s see what comes next…
Other than that, she is now proud of having some male “friends”. -
most of FLR also involve cuckolding because of the nature of the relation. ofcourse you might have some suspicious about cuckolding, maybe you dont like humiliation, have angst of losing your wife to bull etc. all these are normal fears and hesitations of cuckolding. even very willing cuckold husbands also has these bad emotions at the beginning of the cuckolding. i think first ask yourself whats really disturbing for you to be a cuck. such as if you dont want humiliation so you might have a relation without it, if you are very jealous so you might talk about it with wifey to have promisses she will write every pleasure she will have from other guys in your side etc.
but at the end of the day in a FLR, you should give all power to manage your marriage to your wife and since she wants to date and make sex with other guys, you should let her do this at least try this. if you wear constantly chastity and use long term orgasm denial over you, it will help you like theraphy to keep you constantly extremely horny and hungry so you can accept lots of cuckold things much more easly
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