[Bobbie]

My Wife and I are basically in agreerment with you that the chastity device should be worn full-time except when there is good reason to take it off. We tried different protocols about when I’d be locked or not, but ended up with the full-time arrangement because my steel bar cage is not easy to get on and off. The base ring around the base of my scrotum is pretty tight and it’s a slow process threading my balls through it one at a time and it has to be waramed up so the cold steel doesn’t make my balls instantly shrink up. It’s just easier to leave it on all the time. I don’t have penetrative sex with Her anyway.

[Bobbie]

Cuckolding isn’t necessarily a vital part of FLR. But the pleasure, hapinness, and satisfaction for the dominant Female certinly is a vital part. The Female should make the decisions about sexual exclusivity in the relationship just like She makes the decisions for everything else. In other words She is completely free to find other sex partners if She wants to, and should be able to socialize independently by Herself or with anyone She chooses, not just with Her husband.
When a Wife is dating or with a lover, She may or may not be deny sex to Her husband. Chastity isn’t necessarily part of cuckolding, although it frequently is (as in our marriage)

[Bobbie]

Our arrangement lets me masturbate once a week unless my Wife decides otherwise. She postpones my masturbation about half the time, usually for a good reason, but I rarely go more than 2 weeks between orgasms.
She doesn’t really “supervise” me but I’ll have a designated time to myself (like 20 minutes +/-) in my bedroom and she often texts me selfies in sexy outfits or lingerie and I’m allowed to use those to get aroused. I’m definitely not to use any other photos or videos.
She had me install a toilet paper holder in my room for my wanking.

[Bobbie]

In an earlier comment, I’d described being kept in chastity only when unsupervised such as when my Wife was ou or when I was out doing something without Her. But we decided that it was a bothersome exercise to put the cage on and off so frequently and She decided that it was easier and simpler just to keep me in chastity all the time.
Although my cage is the smallest we could find my penis only fills it about halfway when soft, When erect, though, I swell enough to push against the bars, which wakes me up when I get a morning erection. Also, an erection is just that…it wants to stand up in a position for sex; but, like most cages, mine forces my penis downward and won’t allow it to become erect.
My Wife hasn’t yet mentioned any schedule for masturbation. I’m thinking of bringing it up at a relationship review discussion but want to wait for the right timing and opportunity.

[Bobbie]

Wow, Antony!…i can’t think of anything worse than being spanked while being hung over! Maybe mouth-soaping too. i had developed some bad habits, such as drinking and masturbating (not both at once LOL) that i now understand were counterproductive in my personal development and career, and i’m grateful to my Wife for Her level of control.

[Bobbie]

For male partners…
1. When, as relationship partners, you have a difference of opinion, how important is it to you that your opinion prevail? Are you able to see and understand the opposing opinion and accept it?
2. Do you have behaviors that are counterproductive in your relationship? How would you feel about your partner helping you lose habits that are hurting your personal growth and your relationship?

[Bobbie]

my Wife has always managed the finances in our marriage. i’m retired now but my paycheck has been direct deposited into our joint checking account ever since direct deposit became a thing. Before that i’d endorse the check and give it to Her to deposit. It is a joint checking account but She has the checkbook and i’m not allowed to write checks. As my career advanced, our finances became more complex as i became a shareholding partner in my firm, had inheritances, etc…but She always directed me in handling $$$ and i had to do what i was told. Now my Social Security check is direct deposited.
i get an allowance for daily expenses, and if i want to buy anything big i have to ask Her. i do have a credit card but She gets a detailed statement every month and She goes through it carefully, so i can’t use the card casually and would have to explain any charges.

[Bobbie]

This website has a lot of information and can probably help familiarize you and your GF/future Mistress with some of the ways to transition your current realtionship into a female led and dominated relationship.
It might be challenging (especially if you’re naturally submissive) to just start talking about her taking charge, but trust and communication will be essential in your future and so, difficult as it is, now is the time to start discussing with her where you see your relationship going. Good luck!

[Bobbie]

I found the posting of my profile photo to be unnecessarily challenging, actually requiring posting it to a different site which apparently feeds it to this site. I’ve changed hairstyles twice since my pic but just don’t want to go through the whole run-around to update it.

[Bobbie]

Not all FLRs look the same and in real life FLRs don’t often look like D/s fiction scenarios. If your wife handles all the finances, assigns you chores, and welcomes you pamering her, then that looks like a real-life FLR (to me anyway). So if she doesn’t want to spank you, there’s no reason why she should. It’s all about what she wants!
But as a constructive suggestion, if you havent made a formal agreement defining your FLR, it might be a good idea. You both can review the rules on a periodic schedule and that would be a good time to discuss any correction or discipline.

[Bobbie]

i am grateful for Aboutflr! i wonder if other flr husbands or male submissive partners ever feel the need for reinforcement, or a pep talk to recharge their commitment to their relationship? Maybe i’m just needy but i (and our relationship) benefit from checking in here often to feel less alone in my situation.
It certainly helps me, and i hope others as well. And i really appreciate it.

[Bobbie]

i’m sorry to hear, Rae, that your ex broke up with you and i hope you’ll find someone to share your love with soon.
To add to my original post, i’d forgotten to mention that my hair is in a feminine style. i do use hot curlers and my Wife decides on my hair style, which changes occasionally.
Also i wear bikini panties because my chastity cage is metal and kind of heavy and snug panties help support the weight.

[Bobbie]

Sebo is a German company that makes high end vacuum cleaners, we bought a cannister vac.

[Bobbie]

i guess you could say that i’m slightly feminized. Feminization isn’t an end in itself but more of a means of expressing who we are. i’m already effeminate, although i tried to suppress it for a long time, and my feminization also is an expression of my submissive role as housekeeper while She has a successful career.
I do have skirts and dresses but my everyday outfit is typically leggings or yoga pants with a t-shirt or tank top in summer. i wear an apron all the time unless i go out somewhere.

[Bobbie]

Oh, and yes i am slightly feminized. i have a rather hairstyle but not enough to attract attention. my Wife chooses my outfits which are kind of androgynous, for instance, i wear leggings or yoga pants a lot. i always wear an apron at home.
I think there should be a separate topic on feminization.

[Author]

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